Rejoice Njoku
Trust is the foundation of any healthy relationship; when it’s broken, it can be hard to know what to do next.
Maybe your partner did something that hurt you in the past, or you just have a nagging feeling in the back of your mind that something isn’t right.
Now, you are struggling with trust issues in your relationship, and you find yourself constantly questioning your partner’s motives or worrying about their loyalty.
It’s worrying you and causing a strain on your relationship with your significant other.
If this sounds remotely like what you’re experiencing, fear not! Your relationship doesn’t have to be doomed. There are a couple of other things you can do to improve the situation and rebuild trust with your partner.
Instead of dwelling on your doubts and fears, try focusing on actionable steps you can take to strengthen your bond and overcome your trust issues.
I’ve got some of them for you right here in this post. They’ll help you feel more confident and secure in your relationship.
Whether you’re dealing with trust issues due to past betrayals or just struggling to overcome your own insecurities, there’s always hope for repairing your relationship and building a brighter future together.
So let’s dive in and explore some better things to do instead of not being able to trust your partner!
Understanding the Root Causes of Trust Issues in a Relationship
It’s normal to feel uneasy about the trustworthiness of the person you’re in a relationship with, especially if there have been breaches of trust in the past.
But understanding the root causes of those trust issues can help you work through them and build a stronger, more fulfilling relationship.
One possible cause of trust issues is past betrayals, whether in your current relationship or in previous ones.
If you’ve been hurt before, it’s natural to be more cautious and sceptical in future relationships.
However, it’s important to remember that your current partner is not your ex and to give them a fair chance to earn your trust.
Another potential cause of trust issues is personal insecurity. If you don’t feel secure in yourself or your relationship, it can be easy to project those doubts onto your partner.
It’s important to work on building your own self-confidence and addressing any underlying issues that might be contributing to your insecurities.
Communication (or lack thereof) can also be a root cause of trust issues in a relationship. If you and your partner don’t communicate openly and honestly, misunderstandings and miscommunications can create a sense of distance and erode trust over time.
Make sure to have regular check-ins with your partner and create a safe space for each other to share your thoughts and feelings.
Finally, it’s important to recognize that trust is a two-way street. If you’re struggling to trust your partner, it’s possible that they may be struggling to trust you as well.
Take some time to reflect on your own behaviour and actions, and make sure you’re doing your part to build a foundation of mutual trust and respect in your relationship.
Understanding the root causes of trust issues in your relationship can be a key step in working through those issues and building a stronger bond with your partner.
Let’s look at the things you can do to work on the trust issues you may have.
Communicate Openly and Honestly
One of the best things you can do to address trust issues in your relationship is to communicate openly and honestly with your partner.
As the saying goes, “sin thrives in secrecy” – if you’re keeping your doubts and fears to yourself, they’re only going to fester and grow.
It can be scary to bring up sensitive topics with your partner, but remember that honesty is always the best policy. If you’re feeling uneasy about something, try to approach the conversation calmly and respectfully. Use “I” statements to express how you’re feeling rather than attacking or blaming your partner.
For example, instead of saying, “You’re always lying to me, and I can’t trust you,” you could say something like, “I feel like there have been some things that you haven’t been honest with me about, and it’s making me worry about our relationship. Can we talk about it?”
By working together to address any trust issues, you can build a stronger, more honest relationship.
Hear Your Partner Out
Another important thing to do when you’re struggling with trust issues in your relationship is to really hear your partner out.
This means taking the time to listen to their perspective, even if it’s different from your own. You’ve voiced your concerns; now you should hear their own story.
One way to do this is by asking questions that help you better understand where they’re coming from. Here are a few sample questions you could ask:
- Can you tell me more about why you did/said that?
- How do you feel about what happened?
- Is there anything I can do to help rebuild trust between us?
- What would you like me to do differently in the future?
Remember, the goal of asking these questions is to gain a better understanding of your partner’s thoughts and feelings, not to interrogate or attack them. Approach the conversation with an open mind and a genuine desire to learn more about their perspective.
By taking the time to really hear your partner out, you can start to rebuild trust in your relationship. Even if you don’t always agree with each other, knowing that you’re both willing to listen and work together can make a big difference.
Give Your Partner the Benefit of the Doubt
One of the root causes we identified earlier is personal insecurities. Sometimes, those insecurities can pose a danger to your relationship. But what can you do instead of just giving up on the relationship altogether when it gets too much?
One approach is to give your partner the benefit of the doubt. It’s easy to assume the worst when you’re feeling insecure, but jumping to conclusions isn’t helpful. Instead, try to trust your partner and assume that they have your best interests at heart. After all, if you don’t trust them, why are you with them?
Of course, this is easier said than done. It can be tough to give someone the benefit of the doubt when you feel like you’ve been let down before.
But remember, trust is a two-way street. If you want your partner to trust you, you need to show them that you trust them too.
Next time you find yourself doubting your partner, take a step back and try to see things from their perspective. Ask yourself, “What would they do if they really cared about me?” You might be surprised at the answer.
At the end of the day, giving your partner the benefit of the doubt is about building a stronger, healthier relationship.
It’s not always easy, but it’s worth it in the long run. So, take a deep breath, trust your partner, and see where it takes you.
Look Inwards
Think about your past relationships. Have you been hurt before? Maybe you’ve been cheated on, lied to, or betrayed in some way. These past hurts can create deep wounds that may take time to heal. It’s possible that these wounds are triggering your mistrust in your current relationship.
Acknowledging these past hurts and how they are affecting your current relationship is the first step towards building trust. It’s important to ask yourself if your lack of trust is due to your partner’s actions, your own insecurities, or both.
Understanding the root cause of your mistrust can help you address it in a healthy way.
Take the time to reflect on your past and present. Identify any unresolved issues from your past relationships that may be causing mistrust in your current relationship.
Is it a fear of being hurt again? Or maybe a fear of abandonment? Whatever it is, recognize it and work through it.
Remember that building trust takes time and effort from both partners. It’s not just about your partner proving themselves trustworthy, but also about you being willing to trust. Be open and honest with your partner about your feelings and concerns. Communicate openly and work together to build a stronger, more trusting relationship.
Focus On Building a Strong Foundation
Feeling like you’re constantly on edge, waiting for your partner to do something to break your trust can be a difficult feeling to live with, but it doesn’t have to be that way. Building trust takes time, effort, and consistent behaviour.
You can focus all your energy instead on building a strong foundation in your relationship. Show your partner love, respect, and commitment every day. Make time for each other and prioritize your relationship.
This can be as simple as setting aside a designated date night each week or making time to talk and connect with each other each day.
But it’s not just about showing love and affection. It’s also about working together to overcome challenges. When faced with a difficult situation, approach it as a team.
Also, show appreciation for your partner and their efforts. This can be as simple as saying thank you for doing the dishes or complimenting their outfit. Small gestures like these can go a long way in building trust and strengthening your bond.
Remember that building trust takes time and effort from both partners. It’s not just about one person proving themselves trustworthy. It’s about working together to create a strong, healthy relationship based on mutual respect and love.
By doing these things, you can build trust over time and create a strong, lasting bond.
Bringing It All Together
You deserve to be in a relationship built on trust and mutual respect. It’s not always easy to navigate feelings of mistrust, but there are things you can do to work towards a stronger, healthier relationship.
By looking inwards, acknowledging past hurts, and focusing on building a strong foundation, you can begin to rebuild trust and create a stronger bond with your partner.
Remember also to be vulnerable with your partner and let them know your fears. It will create a cycle of trust with your partner.
Implementing these tips and suggestions may take time and effort, but the result is a relationship built on trust, love, and commitment.
So take action today and start building a stronger, healthier relationship with your partner. You’ve got this!
